My heart breaks watching this video. I don't think this is effective
parenting any more than I think running down the street attacking your
'grown' son is effective. Sometimes children do dumb and sometimes
reckless acts as they transition from teen to adulthood. Taking
privileges away is good; but public humiliation sends a wrong message
that may teach daughters that love is 'abusive and denigrating.' Mom went from
two parents who love her, to a deadbeat dad not caring.
This behavior is clearly
why I believe there should be one computer for children under 18, in
the main room of the home, facing where everyone who walks in can see. I
purposely did this when raising my children. Facebook certainly has
legal protections for children who pose as adults. So, parents the responsibility
is yours to learn how to check history searches and call teens out on sites
you don't approve of. Again, this is sad because this child being
comfortable wearing a bra for the camera, speaking in adult language
which flies over the heads of many adults, hints that she is far more active than Mom is
ready to accept. This duo clearly needs professional counseling. This
video needs to be removed. The child needs to be taught what happens to
women who exploit themselves for men. Perhaps, making her write a
research paper as summer fare would benefit her.
Mom would do well to teach her the value of abstinence while bracing herself for the fact that this daughter may be sexually active. All adults can remember the teen years, and how some of the most docile girls were climbing out of bedroom windows at night, soon pregnant to their parents' shock and horror. While this child's decision is sorrowful, not addressing her need to protect herself from disease and pregnancy would be even more devastating. Mom, she is your daughter. I know this video is to help you appear as the parent-in- control; but, I'll offer my advice again: Either find Godly counsel or allow someone a wee-bit older to tell her from experience the fire she's playing with.
I've decided not to include the link. Hopefully, Mom will take it down, NOW; and, by the time you click, it will be unavailable.
20150512
If You’re Unemployed, Keep Applying!!!!
If you’re in the hunt for a new gig don’t get discouraged and quit. Bailing out of the job-market affects the ratings in ways that skew the true unemployment rate. While the ‘stable’ numbers touted may be a good marketing ploy to get young people and some old ones, into the lure of college-student-loan debt; ultimately these low-unemployment rates lack truth. I read an article recently that stated if you stop looking for work for four-plus weeks you are not counted in the unemployment rankings. Also, if you work a mere two hours a week cutting a neighbor’s lawn, you are not counted in the unemployment rankings.
Also, if you’re only able to find part-time gigs and rely
heavily on government aid, you are not unemployed; thus not counted; no matter
how under-employed you may be. Which brings me to the final point. There are
far more part-time jobs advertised offering zero health-benefits than
full-time. Many young people are hopping three and four jobs just to total a
salary resembling a 40-hour work week. Things have changed so drastically since
my heyday in the market and my advice to anyone thinking about jumping into
debt to attend college you might want to read the countless stories of lament
online.
Am I anti college? ABSOLUTELY NOT. I would that everyone
could pursue four years of academics post high school. But right now the
college bureaucracy is top-heavy, and, the legs of student-loan owners aren’t
going to be able to bear up under it for the long haul. I’ve said this before. If you’re staring at
graduation in the next two or three years, or weeks for that matter, consider
sitting out of college til you’re 25. Yes, all of your pals will have a
head-start on you; but, most will wish at 25 they would have chosen a more
sensical major. I know seven years post-high school sounds like a lifetime;
but, consider working in a job requiring a high-school diploma while saving
like crazy to pay cash for your college degree. You may even forego the need to
have the full-time, on-campus, kids-at-play experience.
That’s it. Many are
reading this right now wishing they would have heard these words before they
headed fresh out of high-school, into the student-loan-debt pot, into the
rat-race world working in a field they loathe.
I know this went from talking about unemployment rates to college, so
somehow I’ll bring it back full circle: If you are unemployed you need to stay
in the ‘hunt’ because that’s one way the truest demographic figures can be
told. Bottom line, if you’re unemployed, you owe it to your country to do your
duty: Keep applying! Who knows, in the process you may just land the job of your
dreams.
20150510
MOTHER'S DAY 2015 BITTERSWEET FOR MANY REASONS
As Mother's Day 2015 comes to an end and the gifts have been opened and special meals prepared, we must not forget those mothers struggling to accept the loss of their precious sons, whether police officers in uniforms gunned down just because of the profession they were a part of, or those who died while in the commission of a police arrest.
We must remember Moms and their families, who at this day's end have to make sense of homes devastated by storms that blew through and destroyed everything they owned except for the memories.
And in our celebrations let us not forget those who, for one reason or another, were not in a place of being remembered for all the love they gave through the years. Let us remember mothers who are incarcerated and separated from their children. And, please let us remember to call that someone you know who mourns the abortion(s) of her battered womb and sees Mother's Day as a dark reminder of her decision(s).
But, so as not to end such a special day of honor with gloom, do let us remember, with thanks to God, all mothers past, present, and future for this life-giving role for whom without, the world would quite frankly, cease to exist. Love you, MOM.
We must remember Moms and their families, who at this day's end have to make sense of homes devastated by storms that blew through and destroyed everything they owned except for the memories.
And in our celebrations let us not forget those who, for one reason or another, were not in a place of being remembered for all the love they gave through the years. Let us remember mothers who are incarcerated and separated from their children. And, please let us remember to call that someone you know who mourns the abortion(s) of her battered womb and sees Mother's Day as a dark reminder of her decision(s).
But, so as not to end such a special day of honor with gloom, do let us remember, with thanks to God, all mothers past, present, and future for this life-giving role for whom without, the world would quite frankly, cease to exist. Love you, MOM.
Headline in Major Paper a Huge Blunder
Okay, how am I supposed to receive this headline published May 10, 2015? Is it in poor taste or was the editor off duty?
-
20150507
The Theme of This Season's Mindy Project Destined it to Failure (with UPDATE)
When it's all said and done, Americans (U.S.) are really faaaaar more conservative than they let on. Yes, the entertainment world is full of over-the-top lifestyles and too-much-skin for the public eye; but, when we tune in to watch tv, we want choice. Prior to this season, The Mindy Project walked very close to crossing the line; but, when Mindy callously announced she was pregnant, I knew the show had one of two choices. In fact, before I disclose the choices, I actually tuned in just to see if the choice that would have earned it another season had aired. I admit, I usually miss the actual airing for one reason or another and end up catching snippets.
But, back to the two choices. The first choice was the season would have ended with her in the ER, learning that she had experienced a miscarriage. The new season would have begun with her experiencing some dark moments for her loss, and the show would have progressed with a new theme of hope and promise for her career and relationship getting stronger and more directed.
The other choice, which is the one that doomed the show for 'regular' TV is she would have remained pregnant, sending a horrible Murphy Brown message that single mothers are 'cool'. It's not that they aren't per se; but it sends a very false message. Being a med student is very exhausting. A student's days are filled to the brim with work and study. For her to have a child, and presumably function as a single-mother sent a message that most Americans will never digest as the ideal, while sitting in front of the set with chips and iced-tea.
I understand Hulu is in line to pick up the show. Great. But, I really can't imagine finding it worth the time to watch; because, the message is all wrong on many layers, including single girl over-eager to be in relationship, never quite sealing the deal, never addressing the fact that loose behavior will probably earn you an HIV-AIDS diagnosis, or any other STD associated with promiscuity. Also, the world really doesn't need a glamorous spin put on the life most single mom's experience, equating to a potential lifetime of poverty. I could go on; but, I won't. It's too draining.
So, there you have it. Just as Murphy Brown (the show from the 80s) set out to show women are strong enough to carry the weight of parenting without benefit of a stable relationship with the father closed the door on an otherwise pretty decent show, so goes Act II, The Mindy Project.
UPDATE: I'm glad to learn that Mindy received a lifeline for her Project. She really is a talented artist. On further research I learned she is the brain-child behind this uniquely funny show. I simply hope she will set the 2nd best example and marry her live-in lover-boy before the baby arrives. Kudos.
But, back to the two choices. The first choice was the season would have ended with her in the ER, learning that she had experienced a miscarriage. The new season would have begun with her experiencing some dark moments for her loss, and the show would have progressed with a new theme of hope and promise for her career and relationship getting stronger and more directed.
The other choice, which is the one that doomed the show for 'regular' TV is she would have remained pregnant, sending a horrible Murphy Brown message that single mothers are 'cool'. It's not that they aren't per se; but it sends a very false message. Being a med student is very exhausting. A student's days are filled to the brim with work and study. For her to have a child, and presumably function as a single-mother sent a message that most Americans will never digest as the ideal, while sitting in front of the set with chips and iced-tea.
I understand Hulu is in line to pick up the show. Great. But, I really can't imagine finding it worth the time to watch; because, the message is all wrong on many layers, including single girl over-eager to be in relationship, never quite sealing the deal, never addressing the fact that loose behavior will probably earn you an HIV-AIDS diagnosis, or any other STD associated with promiscuity. Also, the world really doesn't need a glamorous spin put on the life most single mom's experience, equating to a potential lifetime of poverty. I could go on; but, I won't. It's too draining.
So, there you have it. Just as Murphy Brown (the show from the 80s) set out to show women are strong enough to carry the weight of parenting without benefit of a stable relationship with the father closed the door on an otherwise pretty decent show, so goes Act II, The Mindy Project.
UPDATE: I'm glad to learn that Mindy received a lifeline for her Project. She really is a talented artist. On further research I learned she is the brain-child behind this uniquely funny show. I simply hope she will set the 2nd best example and marry her live-in lover-boy before the baby arrives. Kudos.
20150502
Baltimore D.A. Bringing Charges Against Six Officers Proof No One is Above the Law
The video of a man in distress being dragged into the back of a metal cage on wheels, shackled and handcuffed, without restraints makes crystal clear why people have taken to the streets in mass protest. This response is not about one person, but all who have suffered abuse at the hands of those who take an oath to protect.
Prior to today, I had not seen the interior of the vehicle; but, having done so, it shakes me to the core as it takes me back to scenarios where black men are tied to the back of a truck and dragged to death. I believe in peaceful protesting, but, tonight I can more clearly understand the rage of rock-throwing and destruction of city property.
I'm reminded that this is how wars start, similar to those going on in the streets of Syria. People in power, abusing the little man, until a powder-keg response fuels beyond control. Thankfully in America the hope is in the judicial system that a jury of peers will decide the fate of these officers.
Totally unrelated, the seven teachers in Atlanta sentenced for cheating on tests, are just another example that people in authority are held to the same standard as those over which they have power; but, with a far-higher responsibility to model what to do and what not to do.
I pray that this family will be recompensed to the highest monetary-value possible, knowing full-well there is no payout large enough to replace a family member snuffed out in such a cruel way. Also, I pray that God is allowed to let justice play out in a court of law, and mercy for all the jurors who have the difficult task of sorting through the piles and piles of testimony to render a verdict of guilty or not guilty.
Clearly, Freddie Gray needed medical attention before getting into the van. Records show he needed EMT- assistance en route. Imagine 50 years ago before technology was as second-to-second as it is today. This may not have even been an afterthought. The i-phone generation is magnifying the eyewitness account, making the he-said, she-said story hard to deny.
Prior to today, I had not seen the interior of the vehicle; but, having done so, it shakes me to the core as it takes me back to scenarios where black men are tied to the back of a truck and dragged to death. I believe in peaceful protesting, but, tonight I can more clearly understand the rage of rock-throwing and destruction of city property.
I'm reminded that this is how wars start, similar to those going on in the streets of Syria. People in power, abusing the little man, until a powder-keg response fuels beyond control. Thankfully in America the hope is in the judicial system that a jury of peers will decide the fate of these officers.
Totally unrelated, the seven teachers in Atlanta sentenced for cheating on tests, are just another example that people in authority are held to the same standard as those over which they have power; but, with a far-higher responsibility to model what to do and what not to do.
I pray that this family will be recompensed to the highest monetary-value possible, knowing full-well there is no payout large enough to replace a family member snuffed out in such a cruel way. Also, I pray that God is allowed to let justice play out in a court of law, and mercy for all the jurors who have the difficult task of sorting through the piles and piles of testimony to render a verdict of guilty or not guilty.
Clearly, Freddie Gray needed medical attention before getting into the van. Records show he needed EMT- assistance en route. Imagine 50 years ago before technology was as second-to-second as it is today. This may not have even been an afterthought. The i-phone generation is magnifying the eyewitness account, making the he-said, she-said story hard to deny.
20150501
What If Suspects Didn't Run From Police?
I've been trying to shake this thought since the Scott-shooting a few weeks ago. And before I could put it away as a moot discussion, this incident in Baltimore resulted in another death of a black man who, no two ways around it, fled arrest.
Law Enforcement 101 teaches that the arrest begins at the time of the request to stop; be it lights flashing in your rear-view mirror, or an indication you are being questioned on some level if you're leaving the store in pedestrian mode. Even though most instances don't require your Miranda-rights being read, technically and officially for that brief moment in time you are under arrest.
For whatever the reason, this latest man decided to run away from police. Does this not look like an admission of guilt? I can think of reasons why suspects flee, i.e. tossing drugs, weapons, outstanding warrants. On some level, running away is a strange, maybe subconscious profession of guilt.
It was broad daylight, not some dark abandoned alley in the wee hours of the morning. Again, in both instances, broad daylight. If neither of these guys would have run, more than likely they'd still be alive today, possibly in the slammer, and the National Guard wouldn't be holding a city under curfew. I am not saying that rogue cops don't exist. If you read my blog you know my belief that the rogue-mentality can exist in any profession. But, a decade and then some into this new millennium, African Americans should stop responding as slaves fleeing a master, getting hunted down, caught, and suffering the ultimate punishment for an act of defiance, i.e. running away. I think too, in the protests, people need to stop raising their hands as if to say "You got me, I'm unarmed, ready to follow orders to be arrested." I know this stems from some spin on the Brown-shooting; to make the statement,"Don't shoot." However, make some posters saying something to the affect; instead of holding your hands in admission of 'guilt'.
New laws should be enacted that if you run from police, you rack up a charge that makes a mandatory five-years just to deter this 'nonsensical' and life-threatening behavior. And if in the commission of your being arrested you end up deceased, families get no compensation based on your decision to flee arrest. Some people say the guy in New York, Garner, didn't resist arrest; but, if you look closely at the video, he did. When told to put his hands behind his back, he began moving away, trying to start a conversation of 'why'. That is a legitimate question; but, it doesn't give you the right to not obey the order. Too much can happen, even death, if you drag out the inevitable trip to jail.
Aside from new laws, police officers need to go into foot-traffic mode and adopt the programs that have been effective in other cities. It will also make less than upstanding citizens want to join law-enforcement. I can't help but believe some of the shady dealings on play-cop TV shows might not be spilling over into real-life events, and totally unacceptable in real life.
The weekend is upon us. Protests are planned. The media seems as vipers hoping for the volatile. I, as most everyday Americans, should pray for peace. Maybe even have a prayer-march through the city streets this weekend. That should make the major networks lose interest. Blessings all, blessings.
Law Enforcement 101 teaches that the arrest begins at the time of the request to stop; be it lights flashing in your rear-view mirror, or an indication you are being questioned on some level if you're leaving the store in pedestrian mode. Even though most instances don't require your Miranda-rights being read, technically and officially for that brief moment in time you are under arrest.
For whatever the reason, this latest man decided to run away from police. Does this not look like an admission of guilt? I can think of reasons why suspects flee, i.e. tossing drugs, weapons, outstanding warrants. On some level, running away is a strange, maybe subconscious profession of guilt.
It was broad daylight, not some dark abandoned alley in the wee hours of the morning. Again, in both instances, broad daylight. If neither of these guys would have run, more than likely they'd still be alive today, possibly in the slammer, and the National Guard wouldn't be holding a city under curfew. I am not saying that rogue cops don't exist. If you read my blog you know my belief that the rogue-mentality can exist in any profession. But, a decade and then some into this new millennium, African Americans should stop responding as slaves fleeing a master, getting hunted down, caught, and suffering the ultimate punishment for an act of defiance, i.e. running away. I think too, in the protests, people need to stop raising their hands as if to say "You got me, I'm unarmed, ready to follow orders to be arrested." I know this stems from some spin on the Brown-shooting; to make the statement,"Don't shoot." However, make some posters saying something to the affect; instead of holding your hands in admission of 'guilt'.
New laws should be enacted that if you run from police, you rack up a charge that makes a mandatory five-years just to deter this 'nonsensical' and life-threatening behavior. And if in the commission of your being arrested you end up deceased, families get no compensation based on your decision to flee arrest. Some people say the guy in New York, Garner, didn't resist arrest; but, if you look closely at the video, he did. When told to put his hands behind his back, he began moving away, trying to start a conversation of 'why'. That is a legitimate question; but, it doesn't give you the right to not obey the order. Too much can happen, even death, if you drag out the inevitable trip to jail.
Aside from new laws, police officers need to go into foot-traffic mode and adopt the programs that have been effective in other cities. It will also make less than upstanding citizens want to join law-enforcement. I can't help but believe some of the shady dealings on play-cop TV shows might not be spilling over into real-life events, and totally unacceptable in real life.
The weekend is upon us. Protests are planned. The media seems as vipers hoping for the volatile. I, as most everyday Americans, should pray for peace. Maybe even have a prayer-march through the city streets this weekend. That should make the major networks lose interest. Blessings all, blessings.
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